Any Dom/me worth their weight will not hesitate to give you as much information about  themselves as is reasonable to expect. You might ask "What is reasonable?" Well, here is a start...

	Full name
	Address
	Phone number
	Beeper number
	Work information
	How to reach Him/Her during day and evening hours

What might be considered unreasonable?

	Blood type
	Bank account numbers
	Gross annual income

Perhaps this sounds rather formal, but when put in context with the fact if you misjudge someone, you could end up severely injured or worse, and I hope you begin to see the common sense of this practice. One way to do this is ask people you know to chat with your potential Dom/me to get to know them. This can be done openly or otherwise. My opinion is, it is always best to be honest and forthright. Take time to compare your impressions for consistency and question things that don't seem to jibe. No one will be worse off for it.  Let the Dom/me and his/her slave know you wish them to speak to a friend of yours.  Be honest!  Needless to say, be on guard when approached by strangers online. How does that saying go...'Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me'.

If you are feeling ill at ease so much that you feel the need to disguise yourself under another screen name take some time to seriously consider if this is something you should be doing or if this is the person you should be doing it with.   Whatever your reasoning this behavior is immature and counterproductive to any meaningful advancement of the relationship.  Grow up and deal with any issues straight on or do yourself (and everyone else) involved a big favor and find yourself a new hobby

There are so many details to which you must attend if your first meeting is to be a safe, and hopefully successful, one.... When at all possible, you should agree upon a meeting place that is familiar to you. Don't go somewhere you really don't know how to get into our out of quickly. A responsible Dom/Domme will ask you to pick the place. This signifies someone who understands the risks you are taking and the sense of security you will derive from having a handle on the geography.  It is best to first meet in a public place during daylight hours. I know, this sounds like it should be common sense, but there are countless "subbies-in-training" who would be duped into thinking that following the commands of their cyber-Dom/Domme is an indication of being a good sub. Frankly, I think that's just plain bullshit.  "Dom/mes" who come across in that manner most likely have little concern for your safety and well-being.  Their actions demonstrate a significant ego problem if they must project themselves in this manner and demand unreasonable things before even meeting for the first few times.

There are bound to be exceptions to the above recommendations of meeting in familiar places and during the day. Life does not always accommodate us so well.

You should ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS have a reliable back up system in place. Make sure at least one person knows where you are, what the plan for the night is and who you are with. Make sure that person has all the personal details about who you are meeting. I would go so far as to have someone nearby, perhaps at the same location you are going to be.  From personal experience, be careful who you tell about your new found interest. When I was first starting out, I had a two vanilla friends I used as my safe call. As part of this, I had to tell them what I was getting into. I regretted doing so ever since. Be that as it may, do not let that discourage you from setting up a safe contact. You should consider it is a good idea to "call in" to your contact at specified and agreed to times. I always found that calling soon after meeting, and again when I got home, worked out well. If there is a sudden change of plans, such as where or when you are to meet, consider canceling the planned meeting for the time being.  Certainly, life happens and changes our plans all the time.  In these circumstances, better to be safe than sorry.  Putting a meeting off for a few days should not carry a negative impact on a budding relationship.  If it does or if you are made to feel badly for being cautious, think over whether or not this is the person you wish to get involved with.  That type of behavior is negatively manipulative on his/her part.

I always had my cell phone with me when meeting someone one new. If you don't have one, either buy one or borrow one. Make sure you have fully charged the phone before going out. The last think you need to find is a dead battery in the event of an emergency.

Something else you may wish to keep in mind is having a set itinerary for the meeting. There are a few reasons this is a good idea..... It allows you the opportunity to scout out the location beforehand. If you are not familiar with the area, you can get to know it, establish your escape routes, where the pay phones are, where the closest public area is, etc. If you feel it is too remote, you can look for another setting and suggest that to the Dom/me. I can not say this enough, but, a responsible Dom/me should be willing to accommodate you in this area. If you are made to feel you are being "difficult", think twice before you go any further.

Remember, your safety should be utmost in any Dom/me's mind. At the beginning of any Ds relationship, there must be a core of trust. True Dom/me's know this to be critical. How can you develop any further trust in someone who is making you feel discomfort at simply wanting to ensure your own safety?

In my opinion, this is one of the most important things to key in on once you actually get into the meeting.  Stop and think about whether you feel an attraction to this person.  Are you able to converse on a number of subjects outside of the D/s - BDSM realm?  Are you having fun?