Welcome to


A sieve (pronounced "siv") is a tool used to refine, filter, purify, strain and separate. Along that same idea, we offer a support to women interested in exploring deeper into themselves and perhaps making a change in their lives. We hope this forum provides the tools to help you in making the choice that is right for you.

As you begin to realize and accept your submissive nature, exploring thoughts and feelings can be very difficult. You may feel confused, frightened and perhaps even ashamed of this budding interest. To make things worse, you probably don't know anyone in your 'real time' life with whom you can discuss your feelings. SIEVE extends an open hand to those seeking reliable information about real time Ds.

Our mission is to try and provide you information that will support you in your decision making, whatever that may be. We are not here to 'tell you what you should do'. We are here to help by sharing experience and knowledge gained with those new to the idea and/or practice of BDSM and D/s. You may choose to consider that knowledge or not, but that choice is your's to make.

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Of Special Note

SIEVE is best suited to help those seeking information basic to the D/s - BDSM lifestyle.  We talk openly on our mail list about issues that are encountered on a regular basis in real life D/s relationships.  We treat eachother with dignity and respect in this group.  We advocate a no flaming policy.

We address some advanced play issues, but if you are already participating at that level, SIEVE may not meet your needs due to the nature of our membership.  Our focus is real time issues and we use our mail list and chat areas to communicate.  We are not concerned with online etiquette, such as lower/upper case, speaking in the 3rd person or other affectations.  Though we utilize IRC and ICQ, we are devoted to helping women thinking about,  in the process of transitioning to or with just a little real time experience, reality-based D/s and/or BDSM and perpetuating online behaviors in the context of our group is counterproductive.

SIEVE advocates safe, sane and consensual participation in all aspects of BDSM and our lives. 

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A main precept of SIEVE is to maintain confidentiality of our membership. Everything you see, hear and say within the confines of SIEVE's cyber walls is considered and protected as confidential. This includes our mail list topics,  do not discuss other people's posts outside of the mail list without their express permission to do so. If you wish to share an email with someone outside the group, ask for the permission of the author before doing so. If you are required to share your email with your Dom/me, this would not be acceptable and we could not grant admittance to the list. Breaking confidentiality of this group is grounds for immediate dismissal. If it is discovered you have joined the group for purposes of gathering information for your own personal gain (research for educational purposes, writing a book, etc.) you will be removed immediately. If it is discovered you have joined the group in order to gain information about another member in an effort to hurt or damage them, you will be barred immediately.

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Support to know that you aren't the only one to experience the thoughts and feelings that go along with this self discovery.  No one will belittle you for asking questions, the only stupid question is the one you don't ask.
Interaction with like-minded people in various stages of learning. The mentors who participate here are chosen because of their experience and expertise.
Education in safe practices and topics of interest relating to real life D/s|BDSM.
Validation that you aren't alone and there is not something 'wrong' with you for having these feelings.

Empowerment for you to take responsibility for your life's direction. This is the time for you to be responsible for yourself not to have someone telling you what you are doing or the way you are doing it is wrong because it is not how they do things. We hope to help debunk the myths of online "cyber" D/s - BDSM and help women make as informed a decision as possible whether this is something you wish to pursue further.


Many thanks to Beauty at Beautys Castle for  hosting our website.

All contents of this page are copyright property of SIEVE or as otherwise noted.
To be used with expressed permission of SIEVE administration or credited author only.
Last update: 11/24/06